Prologue

1. The Music Of My Life

Music means everything to me. It has for as long as I can remember. Each night I fall asleep listening to music. Every morning I wake up listening to music. I play music in the shower. I play music in the car. I play music at the gym. If I am not actively listening to music, I hear songs in my head. When somebody is talking to me, I hear lyrics in their words, and start singing to myself. While I have never completely written or recorded anything original, I have made mix-tapes and play-lists since the Seventies.

I have spent almost all of my free time and “disposable” income on music and music-related experiences. My first job was delivering The Daily News to a six block radius around my house on Long Island, New York. I took the job because they offered a free cassette tape of my choosing if I signed up 3 new subscriptions on my route. I took care of that task quickly, and scored what may be my most favorite album of all time – the self-titled debut from the Long Island based band named Zebra. I continued to find bargains and build my catalog thanks to the marketing efforts of BMG and Columbia House music mail order services. Eventually, I bought cheap guitars and amps, and later more expensive guitars. I have too many guitars.

Once the concert floodgates opened for me when I went to the University of Virginia, I started going to as many shows as I could, no matter where they were located. Music festivals began, locally and small at first, then larger ones able to draw a national audience of freaks like me who were willing to drive or fly all over the country, sleeping in any hotel, motel, Holiday Inn, tent, RV or Air B’n’B I could find. Woodstock ‘99, Rocklahoma, Rock On The Range, Carolina Rebellion, Welcome To Rockville, Aftershock, Earthday Birthday, Vans Warped Tour, Coachella, Voodoo Festival, Once Upon A Time in the LBC, Rock USA and KAABOO Del Mar – these are a few of my favorite things. Then the rock cruises came along, which I have enjoyed as a customer, staff member, charity worker, journalist and photographer – ShipRocked, Motörhead’s MotörBoat, MegaCruise, and Monsters Of Rock Cruise.

From 2010 to 2020, I was able to get up close and personal with the music, the musicians and the fans. I have been a photojournalist for several print magazines and online websites. I have previewed and reviewed concerts, albums and livestreams. I have interviewed artists backstage and on tour buses. I have photographed shows of every kind, from the smallest and darkest of clubs, to the largest of outdoor festivals. I have captured local artists, new acts, living legends and lifelong loves, from Aerosmith to ZZ Top.

During this mostly silent year, I decided to take a look back, to appreciate the journey so far, and perhaps to make some sense of my decisions and choices along the way. This isn’t exactly a memoir or biography, as I don’t believe that I have done anything of such consequence to merit such documentation. I won’t know if there are any lessons to be learned, or advice to carry with me on my second half, until I write it all down. The songs have been chosen, the memories have come rushing back. We will see where this experience takes me.

With 52 years of special songs to revisit, I also plan to really focus on learning to play complete songs on guitar. That gives me 2 songs to learn per week. That should hold me to a good working cadence. Is everybody in? Drop the needle on the record.

2. The Way I Chose The Songs

Choosing only 2 songs from an entire year was quite an ordeal. Some years had many releases that had a major impact at the time, others not as many. I chose songs based on the year that the album they came from was released. This means that the song itself may not have even been released as a single that year. Sometimes a song hits you right away, sometimes it builds slowly, and other times you discover it well after it was released. In many cases, it takes some new experience to bring the importance of the song into focus.

I suppose it generally takes some passage of time for the songs that mean the most to you to bubble to the surface. Only time will tell which ones continue to swim around in your brain, forming the soundtrack to your life’s story.

I chose the songs that have had the most lasting impression on my life, the ones that instantly take me back to a time, or a place, or a person, or an experience, or all of the above. The names will be changed to protect the innocent and guilty alike. These are the songs that mean the most to me, and nobody knows me better than I know myself, so I can’t really say if others share the same memories in the same ways.

Looking at the final list, there are sooo many songs that I love that did not make the cut. There are lots of artists that I cannot believe are not represented. I guess this should not be too surprising. Think about how hard it is to make a top 5 list in any given year. There are just so many artists and songs that I love, it is no wonder that I am almost always listening to, writing about, or photographing music. Out of the 104 songs chosen, 8 are from bands that appear twice. Those are obviously among my all-time favorites, and they are among the ones who have meant the most to me throughout my life. They are Alice In Chains, Candlebox, Creed, Foo Fighters, Guns N’ Roses, Metallica, Rush and Shinedown.

For more chapters of My Life In Music:

My Life In Music, Part 1, 1969-1974

My Life In Music, Part 1, 1975-1979

My Life In Music, Part 2, 1980-1984

Part II

26. The 1980’s – The Cassette Era

Welcome to the 1980’s, the greatest decade in musical history. A lot of people will tell you that music was better in the Seventies – more “real”, more “honest”, more “emotional”, more “acoustic”. These are the same people who will tell you that music just sounds better on a record album than on any other format. You need to know two things about these people. #1. They are hippies. #2. They are, as in all things, half right and half wrong. Yes, a record played on a good stereo system, with good speakers, still does sound better than any other way of listening to music. I am listening to “Signals” by Rush on an average record player with poor speakers as I write this, and it still sounds richer and fuller than any digital copy. But just because a record sounds better does not mean that the songs themselves are inherently better written or performed.

Cassette tapes are absolutely terrible as far as quality goes, but essential in the evolution of musical enjoyment. The tape itself is exposed to the elements, it gets unraveled, it gets twisted, it gets stuck. The speed at which it plays back varies. It wears out with every play, fast-forward and rewind. I actually made it a point to never rewind a tape. Instead, I would stop it, eject it, turn it over and fast forward it. To this day I have no scientific basis for such ridiculous precautions, but I faithfully executed those procedures nonetheless. Bottom line, the defense stipulates that cassettes are inherently terrible in sound quality and only get worse over time. On the other hand, your basement stereo setup is great and all, but can you take it on the road with you? Can you take it out for a “jog”, or a walk, man? Can you pop it into your pocket and have it inspire you at the gym? Of course not. Cassettes gave us musical freedom and artistic control. You could make your own “albums” with any combination of songs that you wanted. Note: when I was a kid, we called records “albums” as compared to cassettes which we called “tapes”. Technically, an album is a collection, and it does not even have to be music, so a more accurate term would be “LP”, which turns out to be short for “Long Play” 33-1/3 RPM vinyl record. You get why we just called them albums, right? It was just easier to ask your friends if they got the new Rush album or tape. You can also see why the “mixtape” was part of the plot of every teen movie from the decade.

Back to the music. Sure, rock and roll was epic in the 1970’s, some may even say “classic”, and I take nothing away from that by saying that I like the rock and roll of the 1980’s more. That “classic” sound endures and probably always will. However, rock and roll truly evolved in the Eighties. Not everyone may like or appreciate every style and sound that emerged, but none can deny that music went in so many directions that genres and sub-genres had to be created, if only to provide fodder for the message boards of the Nineties. Punk, thrash, glam/hair, new wave, emo/goth, college/alternative, pop and hip-hop all took off in the 1980’s. There is no single sound that represents music in the 80’s, no single image, no single path to stardom or infamy. Everything was thrown against the wall, and most of it stuck. Just look at the variety of artistic excellence represented in my selections, which were extremely difficult to make from this era. Consider who did not even make the cut. U2, The Police, Scorpions, LL Cool J, Run-D.M.C., Duran Duran, Quiet Riot, Queensrÿche and Whitesnake all spent time as my favorite band in the whole wide world, yet could not make the final list. Prince, Michael Jackson, Pat Benatar and Journey were left off. I could do a whole other set of songs that are just as good as these.

If anyone ever asks, I say that I “grew up” in the 1980’s. I was 10 years old when they started and 20 when they ended. I made it through junior high, high school, and most of college during this musical explosion. Growing up on Long Island, I did focus most of my attention on artists from New York. People sometimes wonder why New Yorkers are arrogant, and we are, but we come to it naturally. We just take credit for everything anyone of us creates while we just so happened to be in the general vicinity. I consider 2 of New York’s 5 boroughs to be part of Long Island. They are physically connected to the same land mass as Nassau and Suffolk Counties. So even if they are logically different, the same could be said about Montauk and the Hamptons. In my mind, I credit the entire Island as the foundation of my history and personality.

I was born in Hollis, Queens, so naturally I take pride in the fact that hip-hop took off based largely on the talents and rhymes of Run-D.M.C., The Beastie Boys and LL Cool J. Run (Joseph Ward Simmons) was born and raised in Hollis, Queens. D.M.C. (Darryl Matthews McDaniels) was born in Harlem and grew up in Hollis. LL (James Todd Smith) was born in Bay Shore on Long Island just a year before me, literally the next town over from where I grew up. He grew up in (and famously “represented”) Queens, where I spent the first 3 years of my life. The Beasties were also NYC through and through. I also followed Long Island rockers especially closely. Anthrax, Blue Öyster Cult, Zebra, Twisted Sister, Pat Benatar, Cyndi Lauper, Billy Squier, even that other Billy who played piano. When taking credit for things, New Yorkers will even put claims on their neighbor across the river, New Jersey. Personally, I love New Jersey. I have always had family there and spent a large part of my life there. That gave me an affinity for Bruce Springsteen and Bon Jovi that was earned as honestly as the stories they continue to write to this day.

Enough preamble. Rip your acid-washed jeans a little more, tease up your hair, pierce your ear, and cut up those band t-shirts. Bring your #2 pencil, tighten up those cassette tapes, grab your bucket of D batteries, and turn that boom box all the way up. This is the 80’s!

37. 1985 – The Hunter – Dokken

Another year, another candidate for my all-time favorite band. After Ozzy, Rush, Asia, Zebra, Def Leppard and Bruce Springsteen took a turn as ruler of my rock mountain, Dokken blasted their way to top with perhaps the best 3 album run of any artist ever. 1984 – “Tooth And Nail” on vinyl. 1985 – “Under Lock And Key” on cassette. 1987 – “Back For The Attack” on CD and cassette. They followed that up with “Beast From The East”, recorded live in 1988 in Tokyo, Japan. I had to have this one on CD and cassette, because at that time, CD’s were limited in the length of time that could fit. The cassette and LP versions had an additional 14 minutes of perfection. The album ended with a new recorded song called “Walk Away”, which turned out to be a shocker of a goodbye, as the band abruptly split up in late 1988, which I only found out by reading a Guitar magazine over winter break where George Lynch casually mentioned the band’s demise.

They briefly reunited in the mid-late 90’s, producing one great new album, one horrible new album and one amazing live acoustic album called “One Live Night” which is beautifully heartbreaking, showcasing their insane talent when working together. Unfortunately, those times are few and far between, and likely never again. Luckily I was able to catch one concert, on a barge stage in Delaware, which was magical. I have photographed drummer Mick Brown performing with Lynch Mob and Ted Nugent, Jeff Pilson playing bass with Foreigner, guitarist George Lynch with Lynch Mob and Don Dokken in a version or two of Dokken.

How to pick the representative song from the most prolific guitar band of the mid-eighties… This is a personal story, so we have to go with the song that has the story which is most personal. When my Baby Mama / ex-wife was preggers with our first child, we did not let that stop us from going out and having fun. We were both around 30 and we had heard that “having a baby changes your whole life”, so we were determined to do as much as we could before Kid Baby showed up and ruined our active lifestyle. We kept playing sports together, we kept traveling together, we kept going to concerts together. We carried around a doll of Tommy from Rugrats to document it all in photos. Before our first kid was born, he had watched Green Bay vs. Tampa Bay in Florida, been on a Disney Cruise, made it through Y2K, played rugby (before we knew about him!), played softball, met Dave Grohl and Taylor Hawkins of the Foo Fighters in Phoenix, and attended several concerts. One show that stands out as probably not the best choice for someone 7 months pregnant was Summer Sanitarium at Rockingham Motor Speedway in North Carolina in July. System Of A Down, Powerman 5000, Kid Rock, KoRn and Metallica. Look how cute, Kid Baby is kicking along to the beat, he must really like Kid Rock! Oh crap, something is not right, time for Mama to spend KoRn’s set in the medical tent getting an IV. Cool, happy again, back for Metallica!

My favorite lyric:

I’m a hunter (hunter)

Two weeks later, we were back at it, when Dokken, Cinderella and Poison played the local amphitheater in Charlotte, NC. We had spent the spring gathering input and tallying results of our “Baby Madness” bracket challenge. We had passed around a spreadsheet with 32 boy names and 32 girl names in brackets, March Madness style, and by summer we were pretty sure it was a boy, and we had narrowed the final 4 our friends and family had selected down to either Connor or Hunter. As we walked up to our seats, we could hear that Dokken had already started their set. The word we heard echoing across the hillside was “HUNTER”!! We looked at each other, nodded, and knew that we would name him Hunter. 10 years later, at the M3 Festival in Columbia, Maryland, I dragged Hunter backstage to meet Don Dokken and share his origin story. Don had a good laugh, Hunter was embarrassed, and I made another memory.

The Hunter

Written by Don Dokken, George Lynch, Jeff Pilson & “Wild” Mick Brown

Performed by Dokken

Clouds roll by as I look to the sky
And then that feeling comes, it comes on again
You know desire burns like a fire, fire of sin
Oh, will I ever learn
You’re the only one I would call my own
But then the shadows fall and I’m gone again

I’m a hunter
Searching for love
On these lonely streets again
I’m the hunter
Searching for the things
That I might never find again

Care for you, you know that I always will
I know it’s hard for you, my taste for the kill
But then it calls to me when the moon rises full in the sky
You know it’s not denied
Will I ever find love and peace of mind
On these streets again, will it ever end

I’m a hunter (hunter)
Searching for love
On these lonely streets again
I’m the hunter (hunter)
Searching for the things
That I might never find again

You know desire burns like a fire, fire within
I guess I’ll never learn
You’re the only one I would call my own
But when the shadows fall, you know I won’t be wrong

I’m a hunter (hunter)
Searching for love
On these lonely streets again
I’m the hunter (hunter)
Searching for the things
That I might never find

I’m a hunter (hunter)
Searching for love
On these lonely streets again
I’m the hunter (hunter)
Searching for the things
That I might never find

I’m a hunter (hunter)
Searching for love

I’m the hunter (hunter)
Searching for the things
That I might never find again

38. 1985 – Time After Time – Cyndi Lauper

Cyndi Lauper pops up a couple of times in my life story. When she first arrived, she was a unique New Yorker with an awesome album, “She’s So Unusual”. My sister had the tape, and we played the heck out of that, singing and dancing in her room, as siblings do. Cyndi had songs my parents didn’t hate (as opposed to the Run-D.M.C. – L Cool J – Beastie Boys) so it was fine to blast it in the house.

Fast forward to 2012, and I am separated from my wife, and offered a job supporting the Navy in San Diego. I told them I was not about to fly across the country every week, and that I would only take the job if I could bring my 2 boys and live in a townhouse. Everyone agreed (my divorce was finalized on April Fools Day, 2014 and their Mom then moved out to San Diego as well) and we were on our way. What I had not counted on is the fact that parents are responsible for transporting their kids to and from school in La Jolla, CA. No school buses, unless you lived in another part of San Diego. The YMCA had before and after school programs, which was great, but this still meant that I had to get both kids up and ready, drop them off at 2 different locations, get to work, and then reverse it all by 6:00. This was not going to work out in the long run. What about sports, sickness, doctors? What to do? As any wise person would do, I thought back to my childhood and what I had learned from TV. What would Tony Danza, Will Smith or Gary Coleman do? Get a nanny!

When I got separated in 2011, I was invited by a photographer friend to spend a week on the Vans Warped Tour, helping her launch a new charity website called Musicians Opposed to Bullying (M.O.B.). We would photograph shows, but primarily we would ask artists to record a PSA to help victims of bullying who were contemplating suicide. One of the first people we met was the Tour Manager / Merch Person for one of the bands. We kept in touch during the week. I discovered that the band was living in a van and had a few days off before the tour stopped in Maryland where I lived. I offered up my empty house so that 6 tired tattooed lesbian musicians could sleep in beds, do laundry and recharge. I rode from the New Jersey show with their TM and we quickly bonded.

So, I needed a nanny, sort of, but really more of a tour manager to keep myself and 2 young boys in line and on schedule. Would she be willing to do it, and available? Turns out the band was on touring hiatus, working on material, and the TM was recovering from knee surgery. She was in! I got her a car, let her schedule our lives and sent her up to LA on weekends to grow her musical management career. She ended up tour managing a band that was opening for Cyndi Lauper. When that tour hit town, she got me a photo pass. Eventually, she ended up working directly for Ms. Lauper and moved to New York. We ended up helping each other out immensely, and I will be forever grateful for her hand in how my boys have grown into men.

My favorite lyric:

If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting
Time after time

I played organized baseball, basketball and soccer growing up. My biking, tennis, football and roller hockey were quite unorganized. Whenever I played in the outfield, I would sing this chorus to myself as each pitch was delivered. It was my mantra. Although I did sing it with my own lyrics.

You won’t fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting
Time after time

In high school, I had become a third baseman, and it had been a while since I had played outfield. For some reason, I got sent out to left field, and must have forgotten about my mantra. There were 2 outs, bases loaded, and the kid hit a soft liner into left. I ran up, but misjudged it and it went off my glove. Naturally, all the base runners had been moving with the pitch, so I scrambled back quickly to get the ball and whipped it towards home plate. It went over the backstop for a 2 error, inside-the-park grand slam. I never played for my high school again.

Time After Time

Written by Cyndi Lauper & Rob Hyman

Performed by Cyndi Lauper

Lying in my bed
I hear the clock tick, and think of you
Caught up in circles
Confusion is nothing new
Flashback, warm nights
Almost left behind
Suitcase of memories
Time after—

Sometimes, you picture me
I’m walking too far ahead
You’re calling to me
I can’t hear what you’ve said
Then you say, “Go slow.”
I fall behind
The second hand unwinds

If you’re lost, you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting
Time after time
If you’re lost, you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting (I will be waiting)
Time after time

After my picture fades
And darkness has turned to gray
Watching through windows
You’re wondering if I’m okay
Secrets stolen from deep inside
The drum beats out of time

If you’re lost, you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting
Time after time

You said, “Go slow.”
I fall behind
The second hand unwinds

If you’re lost, you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting
Time after time
If you’re lost, you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting (I will be waiting)
Time after time

Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time
Time after time

39. 1986 – Wanted Dead Or Alive – Bon Jovi

“Slippery When Wet“ from Bon Jovi is a perfect album. It is dramatic, exciting, fun, emotional and just sounds so good.

“Wanted Dead Or Alive” has always stood just above the rest for me. I love the sound of 2 guitars and 2 vocalists weaving a song together, playing off each other and coming together. The Beatles, Bon Jovi, Damn Yankees, Alice In Chains and Alter Bridge did it best.

Fell asleep to the cassette – last song on side one. If I was still awake, rewind it, play it again. Repeat until I fell asleep to it.

One of the songs me (and everyone else) can kinda sorta play part of on guitar.

My favorite lyric:

I’ve seen a million faces and I’ve rocked them all!

The ultimate statement of self confidence and accomplishment. A variation was adapted by the Wedding Crashers, and another variation by the Carrolton Crüe (my college roommates).

Wanted Dead Or Alive

Written by Richie Sambora & Jon Bon Jovi

Performed by Bon Jovi

It’s all the same, only the names will change
Everyday it seems we’re wasting away
Another place where the faces are so cold
I’d drive all night just to get back home

I’m a cowboy
On a steel horse I ride
I’m wanted dead or alive
Wanted dead or alive

Sometimes I sleep, sometimes it’s not for days
And the people I meet always go their separate ways
Sometimes you tell the day by the bottle that you drink
And times when you’re alone all you do is think

I’m a cowboy
On a steel horse I ride
I’m wanted, wanted, dead or alive
Wanted (wanted) dead or alive

Oh, and I ride

I’m a cowboy
On a steel horse I ride
I’m wanted (wanted) dead or alive

I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my back
I play for keeps, ’cause I might not make it back
I been everywhere, still I’m standing tall
I’ve seen a million faces and I’ve rocked them all!

‘Cause I’m a cowboy
On a steel horse, I ride
I’m wanted (wanted) dead or alive

And I’m a cowboy
I got the night on my side
And I’m wanted (wanted) dead or alive

And I ride (and I ride), dead or alive
I still drive (still drive), dead or alive
Dead or alive
Dead or alive
Dead or alive
Dead or alive

40. 1986 – Why Can’t This Be Love – Van Halen

This is going to be confrontational. I grew up with Van Halen, loved Van Halen, had every cassette, watched every video. When David Lee Roth left, I was stunned and sad. Then Sammy Hagar joined the band, and (ducks) they got better. The songwriting, the live performance, the legend – it all continued to grow. Many people point to politicians and strategists and shadowy figures working to split this country in two, but if you really think about it, wasn’t it really just Sam and Dave who started it all? Sammy vs. David – choose a team. Jump vs. Right Now – pick a side. Reach down, between my legs, or C’mon baby, finish what ya started. Ain’t Talkin’ ‘Bout Love? How Do I Know When It’s Love? Don’t even think about adding a 3rd party candidate to the mix (although Gary Cherone totally nailed songs from all 3 versions live). Red vs. Blue. Right vs. Left. Didn’t it really all start with DLR vs. Van Hagar?

Like everyone else, I was anxious and nervous to hear a new Van Halen song, with a new singer. The Red Rocker had some good tunes, most recently “I Can’t Drive 55”, but could he really fill the shoes of Diamond Dave? Would Eddie go back to the guitar or play too many keyboards? Well, the first time I heard “Why Can’t This Be Love”, I was blown away. It rocked, it rolled and man could Sammy hit those notes! I was hooked. EVH somehow made his keyboard sound like a guitar. Pure genius, once again. The rest of the “5150” album also kicked serious booty. The silly party songs were there, but also some more serious, emotional material as well.

I had my parents play this cassette in our car on the way to every one of my club soccer games my senior year in high school.

My favorite lyric:

Oh here it comes
That funny feeling again

That simple joy of meeting someone new and feeling something unexplainable.

Why Can’t This Be Love

Written by Michael Anthony, Sammy Hagar, Alex Van Halen & Eddie Van Halen

Performed by Van Halen

Oh here it comes
That funny feeling again
Winding me up inside
Every time we touch

Hey I don’t know
Ooh tell me where to begin
Cause I never ever
Felt so much

And I can’t recall
Any love at all
Baby this blows ’em all away

It’s got what it takes
So tell me why
Can’t this be love

Straight from my heart
Oh tell me why
Can’t this be love

I tell myself
Hey only fools rush in
Only time will tell
If we stand the test of time

All I know
You’ve got to run to win
And I’ll be damned if I’ll get
Hung up on the line

No I can’t recall
Anything at all
Baby this blows ’em all away

It’s got what it takes
So tell me why
Can’t this be love

You want it straight from the heart
Oh tell me why
Can’t this be love

It’s got what it takes
So tell me why
Can’t this be love

Straight from my heart
Oh tell me why
Can’t this be love

Baby why
Can’t this be love

Got to know why
Can’t this be love

I wanna know why
Can’t this be love

41. 1987 – Time Stand Still – Rush

I started college at the University of Virginia in the fall of 1987, and my life would never be the same again. Like many first-years (AKA Freshmen – UVA has their own names for everything), I was randomly placed into a dorm room with a total stranger. This can go many ways, depending on how you get along and how you learn to adapt to sharing a room that you eat, sleep, study, party and hook up in. Fortunately, my roommate shared enough qualities with me that we more or less manged to co-exist and even get along most days. 1987 was the dawn of the CD era, and my roomie had a very specific collection – the entire recorded works of Rush, the greatest band of all time. He also played electric guitar, 90% Rush songs, all of which probably would have quickly annoyed most people, but not me in the least. That fall, there were new albums from Rush, Pink Floyd (without Roger Waters but brilliant nonetheless), R.E.M. and Bruce Springsteen. U2’s The Joshua Tree was also out that year and was the only CD I had brought with me to college. Needless to say, all we listened to in that dorm room was Rush, Pink Floyd, R.E.M., Springsteen and U2. All in all, not too bad. I plastered my half of the walls and ceiling with Posters, magazine pages and hand written lyrics.

My favorite lyric:

Driven on without a moment to spend
To pass an evening with a drink and a friend

Even though college led to many evenings spent with drinks and friends, we didn’t often slow down enough to appreciate it. We were driven on to the next thing we were doing, the next party, the next opportunity to meet girls, the next drink. School reunions are so popular because they finally allow you to relive those moments in time, with those friends. Hopefully, you slow it down and appreciate having those moments to connect. You have to allow yourself the time to look back, but also the time to stand still, be present in that new moment, and build another memory.

Time Stand Still

Written by Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson & Neil Peart

Performed by Rush with Aimee Mann

I turn my back to the wind
To catch my breath before I start off again
Driven on without a moment to spend
To pass an evening with a drink and a friend

I let my skin get too thin
I’d like to pause, no matter what I pretend
Like some pilgrim who learns to transcend
Learns to live as if each step was the end

(Time stand still)
I’m not looking back, but I want to look around me now
(Time stand still)
See more of the people and the places that surround me now
Time stand still

Freeze this moment a little bit longer
Make each sensation a little bit stronger

Experience slips away
Experience slips away
Time stand still

I turn my face to the sun
Close my eyes, let my defenses down
All those wounds that I can’t get unwound

I let my past go too fast
No time to pause
If I could slow it all down
Like some captain, whose ship runs aground
I can wait until the tide comes around

(Time stand still)
I’m not looking back, but I want to look around me now
(Time stand still)
See more of the people and the places that surround me now

Freeze this moment a little bit longer
Make each sensation a little bit stronger
Make each impression a little bit stronger
Freeze this motion a little bit longer

The innocence slips away
The innocence slips away
Time stand still
Time stand still

I’m not looking back, but I want to look around me now
See more of the people and the places that surround me now
Time stand still

Summer’s going fast, nights growing colder
Children growing up, old friends growing older
Freeze this moment a little bit longer
Make each sensation a little bit stronger

Experience slips away
Experience slips away
The innocence slips away

42. 1987 – It’s The End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine) – R.E.M.

In the spring of 1987, after I had told my parents that I had no interest in attending an Ivy League college in the cities of the Northeast, my Dad offered to take me on visits of the schools that I was interested in – William & Mary and the University of Virginia in Virginia; Duke and UNC-Chapel Hill in North Carolina, and Clemson in South Carolina. I had been visiting my grandparents in South Carolina every Easter break and every summer since I was a little kid, and I loved the weather, scenery and openness of the south, and its Universities. The first trip we took was to William & Mary, which was really nice, and I enjoyed my 3 days there as an early acceptance candidate. Unfortunately, they were not offering any scholarships, so we marked it down as a “maybe” and drove on up to Charlottesville, Virginia. Well we had barely made it onto the campus of good ol’ UVA when I saw kids playing soccer, lacrosse, walking through tree-lined paths around stunning architecture. I was hooked. My Dad left me with a volunteer, who proceeded to introduce me to 3 things that were new to me. 1. Beer – I was not a partier at all in high school, and had never been drunk before. 2. College girls – the young women of UVA are cute, smart and nice. 3. R.E.M. – While sitting in dorm room hallways, drinking beer and meeting girls, we listened to music. R.E.M.’s “Life’s Rich Pageant” was unlike anything I had ever heard before and instantly leaped into my all-time desert island disc top 10, where it remains to this day.

Due to some unfortunate incidents and a lack of transportation during high school, my first arena concert was October 12, 1987 at University Hall (U-Hall). R.E.M. and 10,000 Maniacs set a bar so high for me, that it was hard to match. The next arena concert that I saw was U2 on a road trip to Hampton, Virginia on December 12, 1987 at the end of the Joshua Tree tour. The final show of my first year away from home was Bruce Springsteen at the Capital Centre in Landover, Maryland on April 4, 1988. I had to borrow a friend’s car twice to attend that show. The first time, I needed to spend all night standing in line outside of the Tyson’s Corner Mall in Northern Virginia. In those days, you had to literally wait in line all night for just a chance at being able to buy concert tickets. I had tried and failed to do this for Bon Jovi and Bruce Springsteen concerts in New Jersey in high school. I was successful for Bruce and twice later for Pink Floyd. The friend from college who I bought a ticket for had found a ticket outlet only 20 miles from campus, but he had gotten seats for the second show. I was left alone and could not find a taker, so I rented my friend’s car and drove up alone. I scalped the other ticket which paid for gas and t-shirts. Bruce plays loooong shows and it was incredibly late, with tons of traffic leaving the arena. I was almost back to school, when I had the brilliant idea to play a George Michael cassette on my boom box (yes, that one again). I apparently fell asleep during “Father Figure” and drifted from the right lane through the left lane and onto some dirt. The rumbling woke me and all was well. I exited 29 S and found an all night Piggly Wiggly super market. I grabbed some Mountain Dew and Three Musketeers and was wide freaking awake, with the windows down and the AC on, the rest of the way home.

So yeah, to sum up, my first three arena concerts were R.E.M., U2 and Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band. That kind of raises your expectations to an unreasonable level.

My favorite lyric:

Watch O’Neil crush rush, uh-oh
This means no beer, Cavalier, renegade steer clear

First of all, I cannot find any two lyrics websites which agree upon what the lyrics are. Therefore, they are whatever you think they are. So while my favorite lyrics may not actually be what Stipe sang, this is what we all heard in Charlottesville. See, what had happened was, Fraternity Rush Week had gotten out of hand the previous year, so UVA President Robert O’Neil took a stand by forbidding the outdoor keg party ragers, forcing the binge drinking back inside the fraternity houses. Being a “college band”, R.E.M. was obviously aware of this and included it in this song.

It’s The End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)

Written by Mike Mills, Michael Stipe, Peter Buck & Bill Berry

Performed by R.E.M.

That’s great, it starts with an earthquake
Birds and snakes, and aeroplanes
And Lenny Bruce is not afraid

Eye of a hurricane, listen to yourself churn
World serves its own needs,
Don’t mis-serve your own needs
Speed it up a notch, speed, grunt, no, strength
The ladder starts to clatter
With a fear of height, down, height
Wire in a fire, represent the seven games
And a government for hire and a combat site
Left her, wasn’t coming in a hurry
With the Furies breathing down your neck

Team by team, reporters baffled, trumped, tethered, cropped
Look at that low plane, fine, then
Uh oh, overflow, population, common group
But it’ll do, save yourself, serve yourself
World serves its own needs, listen to your heart bleed
Tell me with the Rapture and the reverent in the right, right
You vitriolic, patriotic, slam fight, bright light
Feeling pretty psyched

It’s the end of the world as we know it
It’s the end of the world as we know it
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine

Six o’clock, T.V. hour, don’t get caught in foreign tower
Slash and burn, return, listen to yourself churn
Lock him in uniform, book burning, bloodletting
Every motive escalate, automotive incinerate
Light a candle, light a motive, step down, step down
Watch your heel crush, crush, uh oh
This means no fear, cavalier, renegade and steering clear
A tournament, a tournament, a tournament of lies
Offer me solutions, offer me alternatives and I decline

It’s the end of the world as we know it (I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine (time I had some time alone)
I feel fine (I feel fine)

It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine (time I had some time alone)

The other night I drifted nice continental drift divide
Mountains sit in a line, Leonard Bernstein
Leonid Brezhnev, Lenny Bruce and Lester Bangs
Birthday party, cheesecake, jellybean, boom
You symbiotic, patriotic, slam but neck, right, right

It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine (time I had some time alone)

It’s the end of the world as we know it
It’s the end of the world as we know it
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine (time I had some time alone)

It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine (time I had some time alone)

It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it (time I had some time alone)
It’s the end of the world as we know it and I feel fine (time I had some time alone)

43. 1988 – One – Metallica

Sisters friend leaves an unmarked cassette in my Dad’s Chevy Malibu with the velour seats. I put it in my cassette case and brought it to UVA for my second year. One side had what I quickly figured out was Yngwie J. Malmsteen’s Rising Force, featuring Joe Lynn Turner on vocals. Turner also sang on the best albums from Rainbow.

The other side was something else entirely. I had no idea who it was, or what it was. It was dark, it was heavy, it was depressing, it was cathartic, it was unlike anything I had ever heard. I listened to it in my room while studying. I fell asleep to it for naps. I could not wait for Thanksgiving break to come so I could track down my sister’s friends and find out who left it behind and who it was. That album turned out to be Metallica, and their classic second album “Ride The Lightning”. Her boyfriend told me “If you like that, you need to get this.” “This” being the latest album from Metallica, which had been released that fall. The standout track from that is “obviously” One, which is an incredible song with a ground-breaking video to go along with it. Returning to school, I made a mix-tape consisting of “One”, a song about a soldier who loses his limbs and the ability to see or hear; “Fade To Black” from the random cassette I had listened to all semester, a suicide note song; and “Welcome Home (Sanitarium)”, a song from the album in between, “Master of Puppets”, about someone trapped in a mental institution, drugged to keep him there, who would rather die if he can’t escape. This trio of depressing stories was my pre-midterm playlist. As I walked from my apartment to the building where I had to take a big test, I would play this on my Sony Walkman, and by the time I got there, I could say to myself, “Well this is just an exam, it’s not life or death!”

This tune has a spooky cool intro which is one of the first things I learned to play on guitar. The Kirk Hammett outro solo is in my Five Fave guitar solos, along with George Lynch on “Tooth & Nail” by Dokken, David Gilmour on “Comfortably Numb” by Pink Floyd, Reb Beach on “Headed For A Heartbreak” by Winger and Nuno Bettencourt on “Play With Me” by Extreme. I even bought the Kirk Hammett model electric guitar as my first electric, hoping to capture his tone.

My favorite lyric:

But can’t look forward to reveal
Look to the time when I’ll live

It is vital to mental health to have something, anything, to look forward to. Validation and joy are not things that are constantly, or even consistently, present in life. When the day is not offering pleasure or potential, it helps to feel like the path that you’re on is going somewhere. Even if the payoff is far into the future, it is the promise of that future that allows us to suffer the slings and arrows of the present. When you can’t enjoy your life, or even see a way to do so, that is when you need to reach out to others for help, and potentially do something to create more possibilities.

One

Written by James Hetfield & Lars Ulrich

Performed by Metallica

I can’t remember anything
Can’t tell if this is true or a dream
Deep down inside I feel to scream
This terrible silence stops me
Now that the war is through with me
I’m waking up, I cannot see
That there’s not much left of me
Nothing is real but pain now

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, wake me

Back in the womb it’s much too real
In pumps life that I must feel
But can’t look forward to reveal
Look to the time when I’ll live
Fed through the tube that sticks in me
Just like a wartime novelty
Tied to machines that make me be
Cut this life off from me

Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, wake me

Now the world is gone, I’m just one
Oh, God help me
Hold my breath as I wish for death
Oh please God, help me

Darkness imprisoning me
All that I see, absolute horror
I cannot live, I cannot die
Trapped in myself, body my holding cell
Landmine has taken my sight
Taken my speech, taken my hearing
Taken my arms, taken my legs
Taken my soul, left me with life in Hell

44. 1988 – Rocket Queen – Guns N’ Roses

The first time we experienced Guns N’ Roses was late one Saturday Night in the common room of one of the fraternity houses at the University of Virginia. Most of my core group of friends and I never rushed a fraternity, but I had made it a point to meet a lot of people in college, and I had friends in several fraternities, and in all of the colleges on campus (Architecture, Arts & Crafts, Commerce School, Education & Engineering). I always had a lead on a party. This one night, the band had stopped playing in the basement, things were breaking up, but a group of us were watching Headbangers Ball on MTV, which was the only way to find out about new rock and metal bands in those days. On comes a song called “Welcome To The Jungle” by an unknown band named Guns N’ Roses. Actually, that night, we didn’t even catch the band name and didn’t hear the song again for months. Their debut album “Appetite For Destruction” was released in the summer of 1987 but nobody seemed to notice for almost a year, and critics didn’t seem to care. For an album that eventually sold 30 million copies and is hailed as one of the best and most important rock albums of all time, it just goes to show that nobody knows anything.

During the last 3 years of college, “Appetite” was played early and often. With its blend of blues, punk, glam and sleaze, this was the album which had something that everyone could love. Over time, my personal song ranking has changed a lot, with each song taking a turn as a bad obsession for one reason or another. The song that made the deepest connection to me at the time is “Rocket Queen”. It sounds like two songs in one, with a breakdown both musically and lyrically that shifts attitude and tone. He starts off as a cocky Romeo or Lothario, pimping and preening to impress the ladies. He ends up sharing his heart and empathy with someone who he really cares about. Both of these personalities and feelings are necessary to navigate affairs of the heart. You need to appear indifferent or you end up trying too hard. You need to share your feelings if you find someone special or you end up losing them.

I did not get to see G N’ R during their brief, chaotic run. From all accounts, their shows were sometimes spectacular, but just as often delayed or cut short, due to the bands horrendous substance abuse problems. I saw the Axl Rose version at a mid-size club near Washington, D.C., thanks to the efforts of a good friend and concert buddy. She had gotten me a last minute ticket and I had to fly home from a project to make it, but it was worth the trip. The show went on too long and too late, and definitely lacked the magic I had hoped for after all those years.

When Slash and Duff agreed to tour with Guns again, I knew that I had better take advantage of the opportunity to see them together. I wasn’t sure if they would stay together long enough to make their summer tour stop in San Diego, so I drove up to Las Vegas to meet up with concert friends from Connecticut, Ohio, New Orleans and Tasmania, Australia. I had not seen them in years, and Alice In Chains was opening the show, so I knew that the trip and the expense would be worth it no matter what. Axl has broken his foot rehearsing, so Duff asked his buddy Dave Grohl if they could borrow his Game Of Thrones style guitar chair. Axl was forced to sit for the entire 3 hour performance, but his voice was amazing the whole time. They played everything, and then some. It was one for the books, like this one I guess.

My favorite lyric:

I can turn on anyone just like I’ve turned on you

All I ever wanted was for you to know that I care

The duality of personality and attitude is most clearly defined by these lines. You have to be tough and tender if you want to play the game of love.

Rocket Queen

Written by Steven Adler, Izzy Stradlin, Duff McKagan, Slash & W. Axl Rose

Performed by Guns N’ Roses

If I say I don’t need anyone, I can say these things to you
‘Cause I can turn on anyone just like I’ve turned on you
I’ve got a tongue like a razor, a sweet switchblade knife
And I can do you favors but then you’ll do whatever I like

Here I am, and you’re a Rocket Queen
I might be a little young, but, honey, I ain’t naive
Here I am, and you’re a Rocket Queen, oh yeah
I might be too much, but, honey, you’re a bit obscene

I’ve seen everything imaginable pass before these eyes
I’ve had everything that’s tangible, honey, you’d be surprised
I’m a sexual innuendo in this burned out paradise
If you turn me on to anything, you better turn me on tonight

Here I am, and you’re a Rocket Queen
I might be a little young, but, honey, I ain’t naive
Here I am, and you’re a Rocket Queen, oh yeah
I might be too much, but, honey, you’re a bit obscene

Here I am, and you’re a Rocket Queen
I might be a little young, but, honey, I ain’t naive
Here I am, and you’re a Rocket Queen, oh yeah
I might be too much, but, honey, you’re a bit obscene

I see you standin’, standin’ on your own
It’s such a lonely place for you, for you to be
If you need a shoulder or if you need a friend
I’ll be here standing until the bitter end
No one needs the sorrow, no one needs the pain
I hate to see you walking out there out in the rain
So, don’t chastise me or think I, I mean you harm
Of those that take you leave you strung out much too far
Baby, yeah, oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, baby, yeah

Don’t ever leave me, say you’ll always be there
All I ever wanted was for you to know that I care

45. 1989 – Kickstart My Heart – Mötley Crüe

Mötley Crüe was a major part of college life, particularly when they released their best overall album “Dr. Feelgood” in the fall of 1989. For this album, they got sober and they got serious about the writing and recording processes. The result is a collection of pop metal masterpieces that resonate 3 decades later. Choosing one song from the last great album of the 80’s is tough, since “Dr. Feelgood” and “Don’t Go Away Mad (Just Go Away)” are its equals. The intro and the riff on “Kickstart My Heart” give it the edge, instantly getting the listener psyched up to do something, anything, right now. The bridge, extended chorus and distorted ending bring the whole thing to a satisfying climax. This banger summed up the entire sunset strip scene for the decade of decadence, essentially putting a bow on it. The scene and the sound was about to change forever, and this song stands the test of time as its final, breathless statement of defiance.

My favorite lyric:

Years gone by, I’d say we’ve kicked some ass

And I’d say we’re still kicking ass

This was our theme song by the time our fourth year (senior year) rolled around. We dubbed ourselves the Carrolton Crüe, based off of the address of our last college apartment and our affinity for all things Mötley. This became one of our stand on the furniture songs. It was blasted from vehicles when we followed our Cavalier football team to the Citrus Bowl in Orlando and the Sugar Bowl in New Orleans. After 4 long years, we were still kicking ass. OK, 4 years may not seem like a long time, but when you’re 20, that’s 20% of your life, and 80% of your life experiences!

Kickstart My Heart

Written by Nikki Sixx

Performed by Mötley Crüe

When I get high, I get high on speed
Top fuel funny car’s a drug for me
My heart, my heart
Kickstart my heart
Always got the cops coming after me
Custom built bike doing 103
My heart, my heart
Kickstart my heart

Ooh, are you ready girls?
Ooh, are you ready now?

Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, give it a start
Whoa, yeah
Baby
Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, hope it never stops
Ooh, yeah
Baby, yeah

Skydive naked from an aeroplane
Or a lady with a body from outer space
My heart, my heart
Kickstart my heart
Say I got trouble, trouble in my eyes
I’m just looking for another good time
My heart, my heart
Kickstart my heart

Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, give it a start
Whoa, yeah
Baby
Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, hope it never stops
Whoa, yeah
Baby

Kickstart my heart
When we started this band, all we needed
Needed was a laugh
Years gone by, I’d say we’ve kicked some ass
When I’m enraged or hitting the stage
Adrenaline rushing through my veins
And I’d say we’re still kicking ass
I say, ooh-ah
Kickstart my heart, hope it never stops
And to think, we did all of this to rock

Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, give it a start
Whoa, yeah
B-b-b-b-b-b-baby
Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, hope it never stops
Whoa, yeah
Baby
Kickstart my heart, hope it never stops
Whoa, yeah
Baby
Whoa, yeah
Kickstart my heart, give it a start
Whoa, yeah

Kickstart my heart

46. 1989 – Love Song – Tesla

Tesla burst onto the scene at the end of 1986, while I was in full Bon Jovi / Van Halen mode. “Modern Day Cowboy” was probably my most listened to song for the next six months, and the rest of their debut album “Mechanical Resonance” blew me away with every guitar sound imaginable, killer grooves and thoughtful inspiring lyrics. When they released “The Great Radio Controversy” in early 1989, they had somehow turned up all of the above and created an even better album. Buried way down on track 11 (my favorite number – as in Apollo 11) of 13 was a beauty that started with a dueling acoustic guitar solo between Frank Hannon and Tommy Skeoch, which dropped into a soulful vocal from Jeff Keith. The drums of Troy Luccketta and bass of Brian Wheat joined the mix as the tune accelerated into a loud guitar solo and a soaring gang chorus sing along of “Love is gonna find a way!”. The song is an emotional journey from heartbreak to hope.

By the summer of 1989, I still had not attended many concerts, and the aforementioned ones had been epic. I was thrilled to find out that Tesla would be playing in New York City that August, at Pier 84 in Manhattan, right on the Hudson River, right between the Lincoln Tunnel and the USS Intrepid. Tesla played between Badlands (a sadly short-lived band) and Great White. “Love Song” was at the top of the charts and playing once an hour on MTV, and it was clearly the highlight of the show. Tesla was so good that the crowd was cheering their name as Great White left the stage as the “headliner”. Lo and behold, Tesla joined Great White for the encore, and there was also one other special guest. Just some new guitarist with a top hat, played in Guns N’ something or other. Yes, I got to witness Tesla and Great White perform “Jumpin’ Jack Flash” with Slash.

Fast forward to summer 1990, and Tesla is coming back to NYC, this time in a tiny club called The Ritz, playing an acoustic show. I made my way to the show, got up nice and close to the stage and watched history unfold. They proceeded to play an eclectic mix of their own songs and cover songs that had inspired them growing up. You can read an exquisite review of this show on the back album cover of the live album they released by the name of “Five Man Acoustical Jam” featuring ”Signs“. They recorded the Philadelphia show, but they used the review of the NY show in the liner notes. Once again, I was almost at a live album recording.

When Pink Floyd reunited (sans Roger Waters) I got tickets to their 4th straight show at the of home of 4 times in a row Stanley Cup champion New York Islanders – the infamous Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum on Long Island. They were scheduled to record that show for a live album and video. Then they added a 5th show, and that was the one that was filmed and released. Missed it by thatmuch.

Tesla toured with Def Leppard extensively during this time period, yet I managed to be at college in Virginia whenever they stopped in New York, and back home in New York every time they played near Washington, D.C.. I missed that tour NINE times. In recent years, the 2 bands have hooked up for amphitheater tours, and I catch them every chance I get. The first time I lived in San Diego, for 10 weeks on the beach in 2005 as part of our ”Value Family Tour“, I found out that Tesla was playing another acoustic show. I got tickets for myself and one of my Carrolton Crüe who lives in the O.C. and we got to see them thrill a packed House of Blues Anaheim at Downtown Disney. They had released an incredible comeback album ”Into The Now“ which I cranked all the way down the 5 to SD, and it is one of their best.

Tesla remains the greatest live band in the land to this day. They just headlined the Monsters Of Rock Cruise in 2019, on which I was a staff photographer, and they still blow me away, every time they play. I would pay to see Tesla play every single night.

My favorite lyric:

Keep an open heart and you’ll find love again, I know

Love is what it’s all about. No matter how bad things get, you have to open your heart in order to let love find its way in. At Rocklahoma one year, I was interviewing Jeff Keith and someone felt compelled to ask his own question, which was “Do you ever get sick of performing the same songs?”. Jeff was gracious enough to answer by saying that certain songs mean so much to so many people, that it is an honor to perform a song such as “Love Song” every single night, and he has the pleasure of experiencing the crowd singing it back to him.

Love Song

Written by Jeff Keith & Frank Hannon

Performed by Tesla

So you think that it’s over
That your love has finally reached the end
Any time you call, night or day
I’ll be right there for you when you need a friend, yeah

It’s gonna take a little time
Time is sure to mend your broken heart
Don’t you even worry, pretty darlin’
I know you’ll find love again

Yeah, love is all around you
Love is knockin’ outside your door
Waitin’ for you is this love made just for two
Keep an open heart and you’ll find love again, I know

Love is all around you, yeah
Love is knockin’ outside your door
Waitin’ for you is this love made just for two
Keep an open heart and you’ll find love again, I know

It’s all around

Love will find a way
Darlin’, love is gonna find a way
Find its way back to you
Love will find a way
So look around, open your eyes

Love is gonna find a way
Love is gonna, love is gonna find a way
Love will find a way
Love’s gonna find a way back to you, yeah

I know
I know
I know
I know

My Life In Music, Part 4, 1985 – 1989 first appeared on Game On Media.